30 Days of Vampires, The Cold Hard Truth About Vampires

November 17, 2008 | Vampires, 30 Days of Vampires | 28 comments

30 Days of Vampires Schedule

Today for 30 Days of Vampires, Irene Peterson is stopping by. Irene is a friend of mine from our start as Zebra Debut authors. Recently she wrote a rocking vampire tale on her blog and I asked her stop by here to help us celebrate vamps in general.

By Irene Peterson

Let’s not quibble here. I’m not going to debunk anything, I’m not going to complain about modern writers wreaking havoc with the mythos of vampires. What I will do is tell you all how to dispatch a vampire, so that if you should ever come into contact with one, you know how to deal with it.

Yes, there are ways to get rid of a vampire.

First of all, a vampire cannot cross your threshold without first getting your permission to do so. Though, if the vampire is particularly sly, it can coerce you or trick you into saying something that will sound like permission, and that’s all it needs.

“Are you going to stand there all night?” is tacit permission. You gotta be really careful because they are expert at twisting your words around.

Wearing garlic chains around your person will certainly chase away the vampires, however, you’re gonna look a little strange. Might I suggest those garlic pills that are supposed to help with cholesterol? They work. It is the sulfur and sulfites in the garlic, both plant and processed, that vampires cannot stand. Back in the old days in Transylvania, the folks grew garlic and ate it regularly. They knew it worked, so always try to keep some on hand, or at least eat Italian frequently.
Salt will also repel a vampire. Should you spread salt (it doesn’t have to be iodized necessarily) in a two inch thick path around yourself, no vampire can cross through that.

Salt, a girl's best defense?Face it: they’re rotting away slowly. You all know what salt can do to a garden slug…it works on vampires just as easily. In a pinch, just spilling enough salt on your porch will work, but at the least sign of humidity, the salt will dissolve and salt water doesn’t work nearly as well.
Religious artifacts such as crosses, saint medallions, Bibles, holy water…yes, they will work to repel and even shock vampires, but there’s a proviso here. One must truly believe in the power of the word, or the symbol of the cross or even Star of David. If you just carry a crucifix on your person but do not believe, well, it means the same to the vampire who is after you and you’ll be steak tartare shortly.

Killing a vampire involves a bit more effort on your part. The time honored method of dispatch is simply driving a stake from hawthorn, aspen, ash or white thorn directly through the vampire’s heart will stop them. There is a stage two to this, however, that is far too often neglected. The head must then be separated from the body and buried separately. They do not disappear in a puff of smoke or shower of sparkles. The body will remain, so you have to get rid of that, too. If buried, the body and head must be buried separately lest with the power remaining in the head, the vampire reattach itself. Make sure the body is positioned chest down in the grave. Burying the body under a waterfall, since vampires cannot cross running water, will do the job nicely. Burying the head at a crossroads works well. Setting both body and head on fire and making sure it is totally turned to ash works sufficiently.

Oh, yeah. Vampires are incredibly strong. They can travel on moonbeams, though that is questionable in this day with the pollution in the air. They have the strength of twenty mortal men and can change into canine shape or big bat-creatures. Using these powers, they can cross running water, but it takes a lot out of them. They do not reflect in mirrors but you can get a good snapshot of one using a digital camera as it does not involve a glass mirror. They do not cast shadows, either. They do not breathe. They have no loyalty to anyone, not even those that sire them. They need human blood to sustain them, no other kind, as the particular hemoglobin is what they need to exist. While they can merely drink without siring another vampire, they can drain the individual of all blood with their lust for nourishment. They must drink regularly…no dieting. They do not eat flesh nor can they ingest any type of food or drink.

Vampires are not necessarily good-looking. Their supposed hypnotic influence over victims is pure Hollywood since back when most vampire movies were being made, the sexual allure they reputedly have over weaker mortals could not be portrayed.

Stay safe. Eat garlic, carry salt in your pockets at all times, avoid talking to strangers, don’t go out alone at night and never, ever invite a vampire into your house.

Irene doesn’t have any current vampire releases, but she does have two great contemporary romances available. Check them out:
Kisses To Go (Zebra Contemporary Romance)
Glory Days (Zebra Debut)

28 Comments

  1. crystal adkins

    I love it! LOL who knew salt would work on vamps as well. Maybe that’s the problem I’m cutting my salt out of everything… lol just kidding!

  2. Lori

    Hmm, Crystal …Are you saying you are having a vampire problem? :-)

  3. Deidre

    I’ll gladly take any unwanted vampires! LOL

    If you’re eating lots of garlic, you probably won’t have to worry about talking to strangers…..or anyone else for that matter. LOL

    So, Irene, when can we expect a vampire novel?

    Deidre

  4. flip

    Eating garlic is a pretty easy suggestion to follow. It is one of the food groups, right.

  5. Colleen

    I did not know that about salt… You learn new stuff everyday! :D Thanks for the check list!

  6. Danielle

    Deidre, you are right about the garlic and strangers comment lol

    but maybe i should add some garlic pills to my daily diet… just to be safe… haha

    great topic by the way… very interesting…

  7. Brooke

    lol Salt! I love it. Garlic is good for your health, and for keeping away the vamps. That’s two good things about it. Unless, you don’t want to keep the vamps away!

  8. Carmen R

    My great grand mother taught me to put salt around the house. She just said it keeps away evil. It makes me wonder how many vamps she came across to learn that trick lol.

  9. blackroze37

    biy vampire wouldnt bothered my granpa, he took a ton of garlic and ate salt on about everything LOL

    glad to meet you!

  10. Kathryn Albright

    Sure learned a thing or two here! I didn’t know about separating the head from the body and burying it apart after dispatching a vampire with a stake. Very useful information. :eek: Just finished reading the first Twilight book, so I used it to compare data. Of course, there is always room for creativity when considering vampires. I mean–I’m sure they have evolved some over the years…

  11. Pam P

    I knew about salt and slugs from the year my sister’s yard was loaded with them, but not for vamps; and yeah, you have to be very careful when talking to a vamp if you really don’t want to invite one in.

  12. Karin

    Irene, I love your post! All of those methods of staying safe are good to know. :wink:

  13. Debby

    Very intriguing reading. Thanks so much. I even learned something.

  14. Caffey

    Hi Irene! LOL, i didn’t know the one about salt! See I learn something new all the time!

    do you know what happens if their fangs get a toothache? I imagine they can’t lose the tooth?

    Loved reading this!

  15. Lou Gagliardi

    hmm..seems to me that someone is only thinking about the western vampire in this post. Oh, well, once I get used to my new schedule, I’ll have my post to you Lori.

  16. Kimberly B.

    Very interesting post. I’ve always wondered if holy symbols would work for non-believers, and if the cross was the only one that was effective, which seemed wrong to me. Thanks for clearing that up.

  17. annalisa

    Loved your post! Didn’t know about the salt either! :D

  18. Irene

    Funny as it may seem, I just threw away a vampire novel I got for free–could not get past chapter 3. I have decided I just don’t care for the creatures that much, or violence, for that matter!
    When I researched vamps for my experiment on Livejournal, I stuck to the mythos, I didn’t Buffy up anything. Maybe I’m too much of a wuss. There’s plenty of horror on the news if I want to see it.
    Color me–easily frightened!

  19. Jennifer A. Ray

    Call me weird, but this is a fun post! LOL

  20. crystal adkins

    LOL not saying I have a vamp problem… but if I don’t eat salt then maybe they’ll come out for a visit :)

  21. Debbie

    Enjoyed reading your post! I didn’t know that the head must be separated from the body and buried separately. Very interesting!

  22. Margie

    Loved your post! I didn’t know about the salt, either!

  23. Pan Zareta

    Another interesting post! I’m learning more and more about vampires that I didn’t know before.

  24. ShootingStarsMag

    How interesting! It’s always interesting to see how authors change how a vampire dies in their novels!

    -Lauren

  25. Lori T

    Very interesting…I am sure that I have heard about the salt thing, but I had forgotten it.

  26. Michelle B.

    Yes, vampires definitely are adept at twisting words to their purpose…with their long lives I guess that is a given for survival…

  27. Michelle B.

    Yes, the sensuality of vampires I think lends itself to a broadening of what they take enjoyment from….particularly when you add in their age & hopefully growth through knowledge…